Through a Pencil

I never had the guts to sit and write about courage and hope in my life. Honestly, I haven’t even thought about that until now. I think in my life there is a lot of courage and hope, but it’s just maybe hard to see it some times. My life has always been so stressful trying to cope with everything going on with friends, family, school and all this thinking about the future. All this has been so stressful and I think facing that in its self is quite courageous, but I can honestly say that I really wish I could have more courage…. because I was bullied for five years and not once did I do anything. I wish I would have said something because then maybe it would have stopped.  From being bullied so much I did lose a lot of hope in myself and hope that there were good people out there, and after that I never trusted anyone. After that I turned to art because with art I can express my feelings and emotions without getting judged or insulted. Now, because of everything it takes a lot of courage to even get up in the morning, to even go to school because I’m so paranoid that people will constantly judge me where ever I go. With art I find it away to relax as well because being paranoid all the time gets me really worked up and I over think a lot.  Art helps me relax and calm down. To this day I still always think of things I could have said to people or done differently to stop the bullying or fix it, but I’ve always been that person who just keeps quiet because I don’t want to make it any worse. It’s stopped now and I’m very thankful for that. Maybe in some ways I was courageous because I didn’t just give in to it, I kept going and kept trying to hope through it because nothing stays bad forever and I always believe that everything happens for a reason. 

By Kisa Blasetti-Ford